Smoke........

Close your eyes, imagine everything you've ever wanted right infront of you, blink and it's gone. The water, pours from your eyes, reaches your lips, and disappears into a black hole. Everyone sees your face, reddening with each word passing from your lips. It turns hot, and here you are, left with the worst feelings in the world. Your heart, torn out of it's usual hiding place, and the area left, is found years later, dusty and once again, empty. Not everyone needs love in their lives, and not everyone cares if they're with someone else, but you realize that can't be alone forever. You see him pass with his new girlfriend, and every time you see them, you die inside, you die multiple deaths..... You're still wondering if he feels the same. His eyes wander for a moment, just long enough to lock with yours, and then, he quickly turns back to his new world, where you don't belong. You wish for just one minute, that you gave him the time he wanted, that you gave the time to fix things, and that you, for once, listened to someone else. He was so into himself, everything was him, nothing was about you, nothing, but now, everything is about her. So, you find someone else, someone that will have to suffice for the everything that you lost, but kissing him just isn't the same. You feel his hands slowly travel from your back to your hips, and you stop him, it isn't him that you want. His heart, you had it. His love, you had it. Now, you don't, you don't have anything that you want, and you surely have nothing that you need. Parties, football games, movies, music, they're all different, nothing has the meaning it had when you were with him. You realize that everything happens for a reason, and this really needed to happen. If you were meant to be, then it will happen, but for now, things just haven't gone as planned. You need your space, and he needs his time, he doesn't need you. You don't know what is going to happen next, but it isn't something that you've been looking forward to, and it isn't something good. You love him with your whole heart, there just isn't a way to express it. Everything you've said, you've meant. You have so many thoughts running through your head, but you can't tell him, you have the fear of sounding stupid and him just forgetting about you totally. You need to be open, you need to show your feelings, and you need to be with him. Everything happens for a reason...... Everything...... You are my everything still....